I'm back. Maybe just this one time. No pressure.

 I'm such a looser i couldn't even keep up with a blog.  no wonder we don't have any baby books.  Mom has been to busy keeping 3 kids alive.  yes, i realize so many people manage to do it all, but i am not one of them.  I think i'll start trying again.  11.  My girls are 11.  I'll update the photo.  It so hard.  Not overall.  Overall they are perfect.  But day to day it is so hard.  Or maybe i have that backwards.  Today i have time to sit & write.  Really most days a have a few minutes.  But every minute of every day is filled with thoughts of my kids. Not even necessarily how they’re doing right this minute. They’re at their dads, I know they’re fine Dave texted me and called me this morning.  It’s only been the last 10 months or so that they’ve actually spent time at their dads house.  Before that he always just came here and then I had to leave because I prefer not to be around him.  Then I get to come home to an even mess your house that I had no part in messing up.  That still happens because they do spend more time here than anywhere else but every once in a while it doesn’t happen. Every once in a while I’m alone in my house with my own mess and they are somewhere else creating a mess I’m not responsible for.  It’s improved my mental health tremendously. Not that I generally have mental health issues. But we all have things that increase & decrease our moods. And not being 100% responsible for 100% of my children’s daily care really does increase my mood.  I really do like to write things down. I write things down all the time. I just had to write them on scraps of paper and then lose the paper. Maybe I’ll start riding again. Or maybe I’ll be back in another six years.